Anyway

I had a roommate in college (“Nicky”) who was 19 years old and from El Paso. She was engaged to an older man from Mexico. One night during finals, she got very ill and had to go to the hospital. The doctor discovered that she had three STD’s. Upon confronting her finance, he confessed that he had a nasty habit of sleeping with prostitutes.
She broke up with him and returned to school the next semester. I knew she was hurt emotionally, but didn’t want to talk about it. Quickly she began dating again. A LOT.
I immediately sensed that she was trying to seek revenge on “men” in general for the betrayal that she was feeling from one.
There was a Graduate Math Professor who lived in our dorm named Eduardo. He was not an attractive man in appearance. He had a lazy- crossed eye, wore enormous bottle cap glasses, spoke in the softest voice, was pasty white and so short and skinny. In hindsight, little did I know then that now I would find him to be the most handsome and beautiful soul I would ever be blessed to have met. He was from France but spoke good English. Unfortunately, due to his appearance and passive personality, he was made fun of often by the other students. This display of childish behavior caused his presence to pull at my heart strings with sadness. Even worse, his background was very sad. His parents were drug addicts who abandoned him in his youth and therefore he was raised by nuns in an orphanage in France.
Nicky told me one night that she was intrigued by how intelligent he was and wanted to seduce him. I asked her please don’t because he seemed very kind. She laughed at my plea.
Within the week, they were talking together in the cafeteria and walking to class. At the end of the month, he finally stirred up enough courage to ask her on a date. It was a game to her, it was a first love for him. He took her to a restaurant and she confessed that she was “in love” with him. She informed me that he began to cry and confessed likewise. When they became a couple, all of the students couldn’t quit talking about it. Everyone dubbed them as the odd couple. She was Latina, beautiful, tall with long flowing hair. He was barley 5'5. One night I got an urgent call from her begging me to meet her at the end of the block where Eduardo lived.
She looked grotesque as I approached her because I only had the moonlight to see and I could hear that she was laughing but there were tears glistening all over her cheeks. We hugged and she had to wait to catch her breath from all of the laughter. She then confessed this to me,
"Rainey, tonight as I was with Eduardo, I kept thinking to myself, Why am I with such an ugly man? I am so out of his league! I desperately wanted to break up with him but didn’t have the guts. Therefore, I began kissing him and acted like I was getting turned on. I was moaning loudly and rubbing up against him. After an HOUR of kissing, he finally went to grab my breasts and I slapped him hard across the face. I told him how dare he disrespect me by trying to grope me. I told him that I couldn’t be with a man who was going to disrespect me. Then, I ran out. He tried to chase me but his glasses flew off when I slapped him and he couldn’t see anything."

When she told me this, I told her was ashamed of her. She told me to lighten up and that he didn’t deserve someone as hot as her.
The next day in the cafeteria, Eduardo approached me and begged me with tears in his eyes to tell him what he did wrong? He confessed that he had never been with a woman, never even had a true friend and wanted to know how to win her back. At this, I told him the truth, I told him everything; Her true intentions, her ugly behavior, her vanity, her STDs.
He responded by quietly telling me “thank you” and walking off.
I immediately went to Nicky to confess to her how I had betrayed her and that I wanted to end our friendship. In the midst of my confession, there was a knock at her door and 2 dozen roses were delivered with a note from Eduardo that read, “I forgive you for what you did to me. Please never contact me again.” He also attached the below poem that I will never forget.

People are often unreasonable,
illogical and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and true enemies;
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis,
it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

*Poem entitled “Anyway” by Mother Teresa and inscribed on her orphanage in Calcutta.